Too lazy to actually write, here's some photos with dumb captions and very little punctuation

My evening

In photos

SUPERMODEL WORK

Work, turn to the left, work, now turn to the right
Work, sachey chantey

Obviously this is going to make me laugh for hours

Staring at my pretty new Fleur de Lis Thomas Sabo charm for my collection- from my honeybot as an anniversary gift!!! EEEEEEE!!!

Made Chicken and potatoes with nothing but a little oil and a bunch of fresh herbs from my little balcony garden

I climbed a hill- a Koonunga Hill

Carved an impressive artisan pencil

(Just kidding.)

ER-MAH-GERRRRRRRDDDDD

-E.

Eostre, beware the bitchy bunny

  HOPPY EASTER Y'ALL!!!

WOW! How do I sum up this crazy easter weekend? With pictures and dumb captions, perhaps even by telling too much. I dunno I am all over the map today.

GOOD (BAD) FRIDAY

(ALSO KNOWN AS KT'S 29TH PUKEDAY)

Russian Tea room.

Nothing Russian about it.

More Filipino than anything else.

They did have some cool weird piggy banks at the front that I didn't buy...

No pics there.

Next on to Flash Nightclub, for a Drag show... or the Madhatters Gala apparently, or at least that's what the poster I ripped off the wall said.

I took the Poster off the bathroom wall whilst my best girlfriend Miss KT puked her brains out after too many shooters in a row, typical of her. Go too hard and end up praying to the porcelain god wayyyyy too early.

Anyways, I don't want to embarrass her or she'll make me take this post down, but she was a mess. She wanted CHOCOLATE HURRICANES and she got one, but then I could see the sickness overcome her. 20 minutes later and her parents arrived, we went outside for a party smoke with Roddo and then next thing I know KT is apparently face in toilet.

So I go check on her and she won't let me in, she later admitted she didn't know it was me and thought I was her sister Sandy, and she was full on Princess Pukey.

I decided it was time and went and grabbed her Leathers (aka her Louis Vuitton I'd die for and her Jacket)

 and lined up her husband to get the car, all I had to say is "That's it, home time." It took me ten more minutes to coax my way back into the stall to dress her, straighten out her Tiara and pull up her panties.

 Just kidding about the panties.

Put her in the car and then she proceeded to puke in a homesense bag or something.

She wasn't happy in the morning, but she was up earlier than me that's FO SHO.

My partying continued.

Long story short there was a table full of old skool very drunk lesbians that bought me drinks all night, didn't even cop much of a feel, just told me they like Reds with that creamy white skin. 

Works for me, I didn't take a dime out of wallet all night.

Our time at Flash ended with the "bouncers" aggressively kicking out my husband and then myself and few friends left after he used his knife under the table to try and remove a loonie from a bottle cap, and it was me who escalated the whole thing. I walked up and some guy was already yelling at me about my husband apparently "Brandishing" a weapon, ok, maybe so, but holy smokes, these guys were so angry and bitchy in my face that I gave them a show. I started off on them about all the other bullshit happening in the bar, not to mention the lack of seats on the women's toilets, disgusting and illegal, and all the other sub par shit about this crappy bar, the blatant drug use in the bathrooms, really I don't care, but I think I was just bored and wanted to create a good ol' fashioned scene. I haven't had the energy for a year to act like a fool in public, and I always enjoy a little trouble with all eyes on me, I will admit. I'll be quiet and sweet until I erupt like a volcano. That's just me.

Or it could have also been the combination of VodCran's, chocolate Hurricanes and prescribed Steroids. It really made me CRAZY, they warned me the Roids would be a bit of an upper.

I had no idea they would make me into an angry gym bunny.

Here are some of the random shots taken by the ever camera ready Best Gay and Friend ever, my heart, JOHN!!! Thanks babe!!!

Me with Demon eyes, with the ladies and Angie.

The party people, and an awesome Drag Queen named Felatia in the background.

John right after the butt judging competition.. he always judges 'em. Boys only.

Me off the chain with a very annoyed looking Matthew.

So yeah, my husband and remaining friends were "bounced" out of this bar, and it was on to Buddy's nightclub.

More debauchery ensued there, and it's a good thing there isn't any pictures of that, more lesbians were lovin' me and buying me drinkie poo's and it is mostly a blur of me dancing to Nicki Minaj while my sweetheart hubby held my purse and looked super annoyed that his wife was on the rampage... but it's ok he is over it now.

So I omitted several details from this this crazy evening so as to not scare y'all, if you really want the dirty on my craziness email me for the DEETS :). JK. I pretty much summed it up.

Oakland ended up on our couch after this BANANA evening and Matt passed out while we watched weird bands on YouTube and drank champagne, great end to a crazy night.

SATURDAY.

No pictures, just shame.

Dirty dirty hungover shame.

Three Gatorades, two pizza pops, several samosas, a bunch of dried apples a couple black teas my prescribed drugs and I was good to go.

Went to hang with a bunch of queers, men and women at John and Jers, then I brought John to my house where Matt and Oakland were lying around pantless, full of Pub Style Buffalo chicken bites and nursing their shame with the rest of my Vodka and Matt's whisky.

I had to pop a bunch of pills to relieve the itch and then pretty much passed out.

End of the Saturday story.

EASTER SUNDAY

(ZOMBIE JESUS DAY)

Slept in but got up to make butter tarts from scratch for dessert tonight.

I for some reason am really good at tarts of any kind, and find myself making them for many different holidays and parties.

Plus I know a butter tart can make my dad smile, so I love to make them for him.

We ate, we drank, talked about the ultra-nakedness of Kinsmen change rooms and how everyone just walks around totally nude for no good reason... for hours... lotioning and using strange talcs and even removing hair in a wayyyy too public manner in sinks and under the dryers. Fucking disgusting and unnecessary if you ask me.

Club fit and World Health you never see that.

Most people make an effort not to be tooooo naked.

That was a large chunk of our Easter Dinner convo this evening, ahhh, good times.

I seriously appreciate this Easter dinner this year.

Last year I was on the couch, 20 pounds lighter, sick as hell and not wanting turkey, ham, potatoes or any other rich yummy holiday foods anywhere near me.

This year I helped my mother host and ate "A Dad plate"- a plate completely covered in food, not an inch of the plate showing, with TONS of gravy, it was wonderful. Ate it all too.

One extra special part of the evening was my new necklace from my parents OMG OMG OMG

Cutest Betsy J. Black cat charm three tier necklace.

Please ignore the rashy excema skin in the background.

A close up, I do love that necklace, the red wine lips, not so much.

I personally hate this pic of me but I am only putting it up here cause Matt said it was pretty.

Overall, a great weekend. There has been so many fun things to do on weekends since I stopped treatment, and I am going to soak it up and yes, go crazy.

I understand my brand of crazy can be a little scary at times, but really I don't mean any harm and just could care less about being judged by the things I say and do, especially now that I value life SO much more.

Crazy can be scary, but it can also be very good. If I am not crazy I am not Erin.

That's when you should be afraid.

LOVE Y'ALL!!! OFF TO THE MIDNIGHT EASTER EGG HUNT!!!

(Me finding Mini Eggs and eating them.)

This is my song this week.


Listen to it, I promise it will move you.


http://youtu.be/HDDA8PuvrIg


-E.

BIG BURN

                 

I attended the BIG BURN event today, as I mentioned in a previous post or two, here is the link to the FBOOK event if you want to see it!


http://www.thebigburn.ca/event/


I got to network with other members of the coalition, the Spokesperson for the Alberta Melanoma Foundation and give interviews to CTV, CBC and OMNI on my story and Indoor Tanning is Out's message. 


One great thing about today was running into another patient of my Oncologist, a woman in her fifties that I met in the waiting room with her daughter, who works for Cancer research in Alberta. When I met them, the mother is four weeks into treatment, completely broken, crying, defeated and ready to quit.


I told her to hang in there and just get through the next month or two and she'll be feeling better. The first three months are probably the hardest. 


She told me today she only kept going on the Interferon because of our talk.


That was awesome.


It was great to talk with her and her daughter and felt like they were family or something, because of the common bond we have of that shocking moment when you are diagnosed with Stage 3 Melanoma, and living with uncertainty in the face of a deadly disease.

                   

I wouldn't call myself a cancer survivor, more like a cancer treatment survivor. 

But this is how people outside of me see me, as a survivor.

Totally worth coming out today- got a sweet card and a $100 Visa Gift card. WHOOP SHOPPING!!!


So that's a quick pictorial of my afternoon. 


MY EVENING!!!


DINNER





An old school dinner I ate in my early twenties when lazy and poor.
I make a Safeway Rotisserie chicken and dip it in Sirracha sauce. MMMMM.

I started drinking this bizarre concoction of peaches, peach vodka, passionfruit juice, ice and blended, with a splash of 7up. Realllly good. I'm on my 3rd... or 4th?....

CHEERS!

Relaxed me.

-E.

STICKY BABY

Here are some highlights of my first weekend off Interferon.

FRIDAY

These two party animals were dancing from the second we got to the gay bar, and were trying to make me dance- which I wasn't in the mood to dance, I was in the mood to drink. So I kept trying to get away from them and then Kt pulled me down the stairs and somehow I am really not that sore. I think it happened two or three times during the course of the evening.

Normal party action pics

This is our waitresses ass. I can only imagine what happened for her to show up without pants on, it looked like she left her skirt at home, or a dog attacked her on the way to work and ripped her skirt to shreds, so she showed up and tried to create the image of half a skirt with her bar apron. 

Probably the best thing about the weekend.

Something about me at the end of the night and duck lips. I always do em. It's like I have less control over my face by 1230 or so, after several vodka cran and three green mystery shots.

See??? There's Mallard face again. gEEEEz. 

At least I don't look like Matt here... WTF???

SATURDAY

I ended up in ANOTHER gay bar last night, without my camera, which was a mistake.
Some guy handed me this card and disappeared into the crowd before I could even see his face. I guess he thought cause I was there with a gay (John) and a couple of gay looking guys (Oakland and Lucas) that I must need a jigalo because fruit flies can be lonely sometimes, being all married to a gay man and all.


This party carried on at home where I found Matt watching dumb YouTube vids and the last thing I remember before passing out at 4 am was stuffing a loaded donair and fried mushrooms in my face and then feeling a wave of disgust wash over me and then I decided I should call it a night.


SUNDAY


Well most of the day was a total write off because my bed was so cozy and my kitties were sleeping under the blankets with me, and they are like little furnaces, so warm and cuddly. They are still sleeping as a matter of fact, and Matt says that's cause he got them jacked up on Cat nip last night and they are exhausted now. I'm sure they'll wake up to terrorize us all night with weird meowing and tearing around the house.


Here is my Sunday dinner.



HANGOVER THERAPY:
PEPPERONI STUFFED CRUST PIZZA AND A GREEN POWERADE!!!


Now it has to be a pepperoni pizza, the stuffed crust helps even more, and the Powerade MUST BE GREEN. Melon pineapple. MMMMM. 


Here I am now, with my hangover hat and my baphomet Tee (cause it's Sunday).

I am going to carry on with my lazy self, searching for the end of the internet and watching sunday blockbusters, if I can find any. I was so excited for Walking Dead but then realized the season ended last week. Chances are pretty good that Matt will just channel surf all night, and I'll watch several things at once, like back and forth between the National Geographic channel and some movie on the action channel called the book of Eli started half way through. My tendency is to find a marathon of some show and leave it on that channel all night, I love Friends marathons the most, obvs.


Oooo now something called Gangland Homeland is on... Gotta go! 


Love you all!


-E.

Vampire chicken, a big decision and MONKEYS

So I am making a very simple, but very garlicky dinner. 

If you like garlic this is for you.

Chicken breasts rubbed with garlic and rosemary with crimini mushrooms, yellow mashed potatoes and cooked spinach with garlic and leeks.

You will need:


Chicken breasts
Crimini Mushrooms
Garlic (pureed)
Fresh Rosemary
Pine nuts
Baby yellow skin potatoes
Spinach
Leeks
Butter
White Wine
An oven
Corning ware
Frying pan
Pot for boiling potatoes


VAMPIRE CHICKEN DINNER

Just throw a couple chicken breasts in corning ware and brush on pureed garlic AND LOTS or you won't keep the vampires away- (you can puree it yourself or get it already pureed- the lazy way is fine) and get some fresh rosemary and toss that in too. The more the better if you ask me, and the slice those criminis and toss em in too. Toss in those pine nuts. Pour a half a cup of white wine or water all over those chickens, and give it a healthy shake of pepper.

Give that about 45-60 mins on 400, depending on the size and amount of chicken. 

Then for the potatoes, I just boil mini potatoes in half broth, half water, and a spoonful of that delicious garlic puree. About half an hour and you can mash em, put about half a stick of butter and you are done.


Then I take a pan and put a little vegetable oil- or toasted sesame oil if you have it- MORE garlic puree and  throw the spinach with chopped leeks in it at a medium/high heat for about 5 minutes.


That's that. Very satisfying.

So there's tomorrow nights dinner for you and your, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, cat, bird, mom, or just you. Whatevs.


IN OTHER NEWS


I am getting my hair chopped to my chin on Saturday night.


I haven't talked much about my hair on this blog, it has been a sensitive subject for me.
My hair has been long and healthy for years, not the thickest but still enough to look full and bouncy. I would never go shorter than my shoulders, and prefer my hair longer because of the waves I have.


When I first started intron-a, I read that hair loss can occur. I was devastated. My hair was like my safety blanket, if I like my hair then I feel pretty.


I went to my doctor in a panic and asked him about this and he goes "Oh no, only 5% experience significant hair loss during treatment. It may thin, but you won't notice much of a difference."


I am like ok, this isn't too bad.
I made a deal with Lucifer (or Zombie Jesus, whoever was listening) to let me keep my hair until my wedding at least. I was getting married in July and didn't wanna have to wear a wig or whatnot.


My hair was fine until one week after the wedding.
I wake up, take a shower, wash my hair and clogged the drain with all the hair that came out. It felt lighter right away. I cried. It continued steadily for months, chunks falling out in the shower, hair line slowly falling out of my scalp and the ends breaking off. Now it seems like it comes in spurts, and I lost so much hair in the front of my head, which is especially upsetting. I haven't photographed myself with my real hair in quite sometime, I have invested in lots of clip in pieces to make my hair long and full again, but every time I look at my real hair that looks like it was mangled by a large cat, I think it looks disgusting.


So that's it, I give in to the deal I made and accept my hair loss.
I know there is nothing I can do and this was to be expected, there are worse things.
At least I still have some hair.


So it is getting cut on Saturday night, my buddy John has a hairstylist sister, she told me she'll do it as long as I don't cry.
I told her I wouldn't, at least not in front of her.
Maybe in her bathroom.


I am actually excited to have a cute little bob.
It will give my hair a chance to grow back nicely, in a blunt cut to make it look thicker.


This is what I am hoping I look like after.

So expect pictures by Sunday!


Eeeeeeeeep!!!


So there you go all you long thick haired and pretty girls, tanning will lead to some pretty horrible things that have to do with your vanity, and cancer isn't pretty, it is very ugly.  Stop now before you have to face surgery and chemotherapy.
(my anti-tanning rant for the day.)


NOW ON TO THE MONKEYS!

Spider monkeys. I have decided that all manners of monkey scare me, these little guys have sharp little teeth and are way to fast. They could potentially give you an infectious disease. They are fun to watch, but I don't want to try and touch one.

This guy is super cute and melts my heart. But the truth of the matter is these guys are VICIOUS. They will beat you to death, eat your eyeballs, and kill you in the most brutal manner. They frighten me.

I guess this guy just likes smoking herb. That's cool I guess.
Still, quick with sharp teeth. Not cute.


http://youtu.be/dIdpZXC8840

This guy is just a lazy fat pothead.


What's with these weed smoking simians?






-E.